Baltimore Jewish Life | Ask The Rabbi

Question

Can a permanently infertile woman be the beshert of a childless man (who still needs to fulfill his pru urvu mitzvah)?

Answer

This is a Shailoh that is highly dependent on personal details and should be presented to a Rov who knows both parties personally. [ED. Note: As we prepare to launch our new site, BJL will be partnering with the Star-K on Ask the Rabbi and Kashrus Questions. Rabbi Ari Storch is no longer answering these. This question has been answered by a Star-K Rabbi]

In both cases it would not be said [ED. Note: As we prepare to launch our new site, BJL will be partnering with the Star-K on Ask the Rabbi and Kashrus Questions. Rabbi Ari Storch is no longer answering these. This question has been answered by a Star-K Rabbi]

If it is a mess that disturbs the regular use of the table and the floor, as long as the cleanup is done in a Shabbos-permissible manner, it is permitted. [ED. Note: As we prepare to launch our new site, BJL will be partnering with the Star-K on Ask the Rabbi and Kashrus Questions. Rabbi Ari Storch is no longer answering these. This question has been answered by a Star-K Rabbi]

The questioner wrote those words not the rabbi. The Rabbi's answer is relevant regardless of the questioner's intent with the words "made a turn". [ED. Note: As we prepare to launch our new site, BJL will be partnering with the Star-K on Ask the Rabbi and Kashrus Questions. Rabbi Ari Storch is no longer answering these. This question has been answered by a Star-K Rabbi]

In one's home anything that smells may be cleaned up even if otherwise muktzah. Outside however this would be problematic. Please note that there are many details associated with Halachically correct pet ownership; it is worth discussing with your Rabbi.[ED. Note: As we prepare to launch our new site, BJL will be partnering with the Star-K on Ask the Rabbi and Kashrus Questions. Rabbi Ari Storch is no longer answering these. This question has been answered by a Star-K Rabbi]

Question Submitted by Shaul Berg

Question

Could you talk about "teaching torah" to non jews? I know the gemarra tells us not to, but what happens when one of them asks about something? Like someone just asked me for a list of the 613 mitzvos. And did not all the Rabbonim of the past that debated with non jews have to explain our torah to them? Thanks Shaul Berg

Answer

In general, one may share basic information in an informal way with a non Jew (list of mitzvos). But certainly in-depth instruction of Torah is something that could be problematic. The defense of Judaism - especially when lives are at stake - is certainly permitted and was therefore done many times throughout the centuries [ED. Note: As we prepare to launch our new site, BJL will be partnering with the Star-K on Ask the Rabbi and Kashrus Questions. Rabbi Ari Storch is no longer answering these. This question has been answered by a Star-K Rabbi]

Indeed placing the cream on the skin without smearing is permitted and is often recommended when baby's have diaper rash. [ED. Note: As we prepare to launch our new site, BJL will be partnering with the Star-K on Ask the Rabbi and Kashrus Questions. Rabbi Ari Storch is no longer answering these. This question has been answered by a Star-K Rabbi]

Question Submitted by ikibah craine

Question

Hi. If my doctor prescribed acne medication for me and stressed the importance of not missing even one day in order to receive the full benefits of the medication, what is the protocol for shabbos. The medication consists of a face wash which is like a liquid soap and a benozyl peroxide cream.

Answer

This is a common question. The pills may be taken. The liquid soap may be used as long as it pours like a liquid. The cream is too thick to be used on Shabbos. People use it right before shabbos and right after shabbos and skip a morning use if prescribed twice a day. If prescribed once a day they use it in the evening before and after shabbos. They report that this works well. [ED. Note: As we prepare to launch our new site, BJL will be partnering with the Star-K on Ask the Rabbi and Kashrus Questions. Rabbi Ari Storch is no longer answering these. This question has been answered by a Star-K Rabbi]

Question

Are you allowed to groom your pet on chol hamoed?

Answer

From a halachic standpoint it seems that they are still responsible to pay you since the money never technically left their account into yours. I would recommend first discussing this calmly before having a confrontation. It is very possible that they will be understanding. It would also be appropriate for you to allow them some time to render payment considering that they may not be aware of a significant expense coming due right how. It was not their fault that the checks were not cashed. It is also important to find out what the laws are from a qualified legal expert as that may have bearings on the ability to collect these funds and since I am not a lawyer I am not qualified to give legal advice. This answer therefore should not be considered as legal advice, I am merely reflecting my opinion from a halachic standpoint somewhat independent from what the civil law states or mandates.

Not only is it not permitted in that scenario, but even if the other individual grants permission it is prohibited. This is a violation of the service provider's terms and agreements and it would fall into the category known as "Zeh Neheneh V'Zeh Chaser." Meaning one person benefits to the detriment of another. The service which is being stolen is offered to paying customers only.

I see no problem with it.

Question Submitted by David Wolf

Question

My dear rabbi, please correct any mistaken assumptions in the following question. I understand that one has up to 72 minutes between "bites" or "swallows" to continue a meal. What if one didn't make a Motzi, but rather just make whatever brochos are applicable. Is the 72-minute requirement then applied to each TYPE of food independently? Thanks. DW

Answer

Not that I am familiar with.

The Pidyon Haben is obligatory and not just optional. It is performed for a naturally born first born male provided that neither his paternal nor maternal grandfather is a Kohein or Levi.

Question Submitted by Yaakov Lasson

Question

Is there really such a thing as it being assur or a bad thing to take a nap on Rosh Hashanah?

Answer

It is not prohibited, however, it is customary to refrain from napping on Rosh Hashanah. However, the alternative should not just be sitting around and not being productive.

Question

If the 31st day after a Bechor's birth falls out this coming Sunday (T'Zom Gedalyah) when would be the proper time to perform the Pidyon HaBen?

Answer

The Shach mentions that the custom in such cases is to have the pidyon on the fast day and the meal later that evening. (Shach YD 305:12)

There are many opinions as to what is recommended and what is not when reading material about other religions. I encourage you to speak to your personal Rav who can help guide you to find whatever materials you are looking for while still maintaining the appropriate perspectives.

Jewish law technically allows for several types of burial processes. However, some have not been practiced since ancient times. I encourage you to speak to your Rav in person to discuss what you would like and to see what is considered to be acceptabl by today's standards.

A Jewish (or non-Jewish) person is permitted to test, but the results are not acceptable to consider the man a Kohein. There are many factors that need to be considered when determining whether one is a Kohein. For example, if one's male ancestor married a divorcee (or non-Jew) then he would not be a Kohein although his paternally inherited DNA would show a link between him and Aharon. There are additional concerns with regard to the acceptability of the test results for other genetic reasons.

Question Submitted by Cary Barad

Question

Does one need to make the bracha borei minei bisamim when walking into a perfume store?

Answer

If the merchant has perfumes on display and makes sure the aroma fills the store then one must make a brachah when entering.

Question

Is it considered Lashon Hara to disparage a certain restaurant (for ex.- X is so much better than Y!) Perhaps one is just stating their opinion and therefore not a problem. Maybe there is a difference between critiquing the food and critiquing the restaurant itself (in which case you denigrate the Jewish owner)-? Also, perhaps speaking ill of a certain caterer would certainly be problematic since the caterer's business, his food and he himself are inextricably linked-? Thanks in advance for your comments on this matter.

Answer

While one is entitled to his opinion, that does not mean that the subject is not loshon harah. Even when telling the truth, speaking negatively about another is loshon harah. In this situation, you are affecting one's livelihood. While it is permissible in certain situations to inform someone of a bad experience in order that they not make the same mistake, there are many caveats that need to be considered. Generally, they would not be met in your type of situation.

Question Submitted by Yaakov Lasson

Question

Is it ok to use the same plastic collander/strainer for vegetables and noodles cooked in milchig/fleishig/parve pots?

A tax refund is money you earned that was inadvertently paid to the government as taxes. Since you, presumably, did not take maaser on this earned income when it came in, because you sent it to Uncle Sam, you should do so now.

Question Submitted by Chaya Greenhaus

Question

Can one put on a freshly laundered shirt on for Shabbos Chazon?

Answer

The contemporary custom is to allow one to wear a freshly laundered shirt for Shabbos Chazon.

Question

I know that during the 9 days, I can't just randomly turn on the radio, youtube, pandora, etc for music. Am I allowed to use music for exercise and go to exercise classes (for example, ZUMBA) during the 9 days?

Answer

You may, provided that the purpose of the music is for exercise and not for enjoyment.

The corporeal imagery found in biblical and talmudic texts is taken allegorical. It is considered to be describing attributes of God metaphorically. The Rambam writes about this extensively in his philosophical work, Moreh Nevuchim.

Both are acceptable. Many keep them covered while they make hamotzei to demonstrate how the manna was covered completely in dew when it was given in the Wilderness. However, it is not obligatory to do so. It is also not obligatory to take both loaves out of their wrapping, however, many place all ten fingers directly on both loaves for symbolic reasons and for this one may want to remove both loaves from any wrapping.

While there may be reason to permit. In kashrus cases that have similar factors that are relavent to flavored cigars, many kashrus organizations recommend against lenient positions in matters like these. Most often, the leniencies only arise when there is pressing need as it is dependent on a detailed debate with regard to inhalation of prohibited substances (reichah). You may not pick your psoriasis on Shabbos, refuah sheleimah.

Question Submitted by ikibah craine

Question

If I got a quote for a service from a non Jew (say a new entrance door plus installation) from one place, and received a higher quote from a Jewish worker that is in need of business, am I allowed to hire the Jewish worker and pay the difference from Maaser money?

Answer

The determination whether giving him the business may depend on exactly how significantly he needs the work. I encourage you to speak to your Rav to discuss this circumstance in more detail.

Question

I am confused and disturbed regarding your answer to the question regarding shaving on Erev Shabbos. If it is considered not kovodik to Shabbos if one does not shave, are you implying that Rabbonim in the Baltimore community who do not shave or cut their beards are not honoring Shabbos? Please explain.

Answer

Generally, obligatory payments are not able to be used with "maaser money." There is a debate as to how to consider shul memberships. The shuls do require membership, however, there are many other places that one can daven including many that have no membership fee. Thus, there are many opinions as to how to treat shul membership. I encourage you to speak to your personal Rav to ascertain whether he feels all, some, or none of the fee can be deducted from maaser.

Question Submitted by

Question

Is it permissible to sleep unclothed?

Question Submitted by Chaim Rubenstein

Question

Is it permissible to open a package of daily single use contact lenses for immediate use on Shabbos?Thanks

Answer

I cannot comment on all contact lens packaging because there may be types that I am unfamiliar with. However, the type(s) that I use (and of those I have in the past) has a plastic piece on the bottom that contains some solution and a lens. The packaging has a paper/foil that is stuck/glued to the top (this usually has the brand name and prescription information printed on it). I believe most lenses are packaged in a similar fashion, but cannot say with certainty. This type of packaging can be opened on Shabbos, although you should be careful not to rip any lettering on the paper/foil (which generally does not happen anyway).

Question

When considering what to skip because one is late for minyan and wants to daven shemona esrei with the minyan is the expectation that there is enough time to daven what isn't skipped very quickly, or at a slower pace. In which case is it better to daven the fewer things slower or the full pesukei d'zimrah at warp speed, as it seems most morning minyanim do nowadays anyway?...for some people even when they are on time would have to skip half of it to keep up.

Answer

It is better to say fewer portions with concentration and understanding than saying more without.

Question Submitted by Dina Marer

Question

A person who davins nusach sfard davind with a nusach ashkanaz minyon-how does he davin TACHNUN ?

Answer

He may not say the 13 Midos since those are only to be recited together with a minyan. He should not do anything that makes him stand out from the rest of the congregation but he may quietly recite his version.

The 613 commandments of God given to us via Moses are civil, ceremonial, and any other form of commandment He gave. The Ten Commandments are not separate from them, rather, they are part of the 613. All are contained in the Five Books of Moses and the traditions passed along from Moses. Their application is explained in the Talmud. If you are interested I recommend you read Maimonides' book on the 613 commandments in which he explains what he felt was the proper methodology to categorize what constitutes a commandment and then he provides a list of the 613 that fit his system.

Question Submitted by Pat Paulsen

Question

Can a yid request a DNR (Do Not Resucuitate) for if/when chas v'shalom that time comes. I'm asking because if a yid has to hold by "afeelu cherev chada munach al tzavarav" it would seem that a DNR would be unacceptable.

Answer

End of life issues can be very complex and very personal. It is important to discuss them with one's personal Rav and then to seek adequate legal advice to ensure that those wishes are conveyed properly. I therefore encourage you to speak to your personal Rav about this topic if it interests you.

Question

8-28-2012 Good morning Rabbi and welcome back. My question today is not a Halacha question. We see in the Torah many blessings and promises for those who embrace and are faithful to the Torah and Mitzvos. Yet, we see in actual life that many who are faithful to Torah and Mitzvos suffer terribly and the promises and blessings do not come for them. When this question is raised there are numerous answers as to why life needs to be that way. Sometimes it is attributed to some lack of diligence. Sometimes it is because of the sins of previous generations. Sometimes it is because of the needs of the nation as a whole and sometimes it is attributed to a misunderstanding of the blessing or the promise based on a nuanced interpretation previously unknown or unanticipated. And that's all fine. My question is as follows: How do we know that all of this will not be repeated in the next world and all the promises and blessings we assume and expect of the next world will not be denied to us for the same or similar reasons? May I also ask for the citations for this question. I thank you in advance for dealing with my question. Bryon W. Szojchet, Esq.

Answer

A person is held accountable for all of his personal actions and is rewarded and punished accordingly in the next world. There may be many things he was unaware of that he either accomplished or affected adversely for which he will receive his proper payment or punishment in the next world and these may come as somewhat of a surprise. Things that were not due to his actions will not be considered. (See Ramban's Sha'ar Hagmul for more on these very philosophical ideas)

Question Submitted by Bryon Szojchet

Question

Ask the Rabbi will resume on Aug 27.

Answer

Thank you for your understanding...

Question

If I found an avaida do i have to pay for a classified ad in a newspaper - assuming the cost of the ad is less than the avaida ? If I do have to or I want to do so voluntarily, can I ask the loser for the cost of the ad ?

Answer

Although the Ketzos and Nesivos question whether one has transgresses the technical rules of stealing in such a circumstance, the Mishna itself only applies this rule to the obligation to pay punitive damages. (See B"K 62b and Ketzos and Nesivos 34.) This rule is specific to the previously stolen object. Breaking into another's house would not be permissible. Additionally, these acts are illegal and prohibited.

Question Submitted by Abe Finkelstein

Question

What is the basis and is their a requirement to have black stripes on your tzitzis? Why are they only on woolen and not Cotton tzitzis?

Answer

There is no requirement to have black stripes on one's tzitzis; it is only a custom. This custom evolved from an earlier one in which people would have blue stripes on their talis in order to remind them of techeiles. As time went on black stripes replaced the blue (black displays mourning frequently). My assumption why this custom took off with regard to wool tzitzis and not cotton is because the wool ones look more similar to the taleisim that most people wear. Additionally, although the Rema maintains that clothing of all materials needs tzitzis from a biblical standpoint, the Mechaber maintains that only wool and linen garments have the biblical requirement and others are only rabbinic. So, it could be that this played a role in the evolution of the minhag. Lastly, since techeiles was wool it could be that the stripes were only done on garments made of wool to make them somewhat similar to actual techeiles, colored wool.

Question

When is a "Hoicha Kedusha" i.e. skipping the repetition of most of shemonah esrei permitted/not permitted etc.? It seems people call for it whenever in a rush.

Answer

The Shulchan Aruch only allows for this when there will be insufficient time to recite Mincha and Chazaras Hashatz prior to the end of the allotted time for Mincha (halachic nightfall), (SA OC 232:1) The Aruch Hashulchan mentions that this only would apply when davening in a shul/beis midrash where there will be ten men answering amein to Chazaras Hashatz. However, in a home minyan where there is just barely a minyan from the start, the chances of there being ten men listening to Chazaras Hashatz and answering appropriately is slim and it is therefore better to do a heiche kedusha than having Chazaras Hashatz without the appropriate number of men responding. (Aruch Hashulchan OC 232:7) Obviously, the Aruch Hashulchan prefers a situation where this would not be necessary and all ten would respond appropriately, but where one reasonably would assume this not to be the case the Aruch Hashulchan advocates for the heiche kedusha. Many yeshivos have also instituted heiche kedhusha because the roshei yeshiva felt that the extra time spent learning warranted such action. Obviously, one needs to be intellectually honest when these decisions.

Question Submitted by Abe Finkelstein

Question

This might seem like a silly question but it is meant in the utmost of sincerity. After 120 years, do neshamos talk to each other, recognize each other,learn with reach other, etc? As we lose our gedolim, while wondering who will "take their place" - as if thats possible -I just wonder what their neshamos are doing.

Answer

It would seem that they actually do interact quite a lot. In fact, the Gemara has many stories that discuss how great Rabbanim learn together in the heavenly yeshiva.

Question

Good afternoon Rabbi. Question from the Yeshivisheh Mesechtos. If Reuvain slaps Shimon in the face he can be made to pay by Bais Din. What if Reuvain slapped Shimon but did so only after Shimon seriously offended him, for example, he cursed or ridiculed a loved one of his, a father or such. Would the provocation mitigate the collectable damages? May I trouble you to provide citations if available. I thank you in advance for your time and trouble. Bryon W. SZojchet, Esq.

Answer

The topic you are mentioning is actually not found in Mishna, rather, in a Tosefta. The populace may not give over an inhabitant in order to save themselves. (Tosefta Terumos 7; also see Rambam Yesodei Hatorah 5:5) Once the invaders enter, there is no suspension of the regular rules of the necessity to preserve life. Those rules, however, do not require one to put himself into a possibly fatal situation.

The mitzvah applies to all types of sicknesses, physical or mental. The purest form of the mitzvah seems to be to take care of the needs of the patient and to pray for a recovery, not just a visit. As such, it is a tremendous act of kindness deserving of great reward.

Question Submitted by Bryon Szojchet

Question

After visiting a few shuls today for various simchas I sense there is a difference of opinion on what to do with the ice/snow on Shabbos. Some shuls obviously understand the pikuach nefesh that ice presents and others don't seem to care at all. Can u weigh in on what the thinking might be to not protect the tzibbur from falling and becoming injured chas v'shalom?

My understanding is that the current Rebbe of Savran is Rav Yissachar Dov Hager of Har Nof Yerushalayim. I am unaware of areas that are densely populated with Chasidim of this group, nor of any major distinguishing features of this particular branch of Chasidism.

Question Submitted by jay nombre

Question

12-2-2011 Good evening Rabbi. I am under the impression that it is 'asur' to Daven in a conservative or reform minyan. This is aside from the 'eiruv' (mixed seating) issue. What is the reason this is prohibited even if only men are present and what is the citation for this ruling? I thank you in advance. Bryon W. Szojchet, Esq.

Answer

Besides the issues you raised, there are other issues. Reform and Conservative Judaisms broke off from the traditional Orthodox and changed many of the practices and services. This historical deviation from the traditional Orthodox approach is, by definition, a start of a new way to serve Hashem, and it is one that was/is not recognized by the original rabbinic approach. As such, the services are not recognized by the traditional authorities (and those that continue to maintain those traditional approaches). There is a requirement for one to distance himself from foreign services of Hashem and therefore the traditional authorities ruled that one is required to distance himself from these styles of services. (Igros Moshe O.C. vol. 4 91:6)

Question Submitted by Bryon Szojchet

Question

What is the extent of Kibbud Av vAim toward parents and grandparents who are machalilei shabbos. I also notice on very frum wedding invitations they don't say the mothers name on Reb So and So 'v'rayaso', they say the kallahs name however, what's the deal Rabbi, what is the deal!

Answer

Question Submitted by al gore

Question

when chosing a rav- should a person go with a big talmid chochom with a similar background and understanding of you and your family or a rav who you have more a personal connection with and is more excessible

See Shulchan Aruch O.C. 83:2 and the Mishna Berurah's elucidation there.

While one may leave one of the challahs in a bag, it would be appropriate to take it out in order that his fingers be touching it. 2. One needs to hold both challahs in his hands. (Shulchan Aruch O.C. 274:1) 3. One should hold the challahs through the entire bracha. (Ibid.) 4. One may use a frozen challah. 5. While it seems that some authorities would maintain that the others technically do not need to eat from the lechem mishna (although since they are being yotzei with his bracha they may not eat from their pieces until he eats from his) nevertheless the custom is that they do. (See Mishna Berurah 274:8)

Question Submitted by Boruch Wikowsky

Question

In this weeks parsha there is a famous mechilta that has a story of two identical sisters who switched in order to save the other one from the sentence of her sotah fate. The story ends that when later they kissed, the sotah smelled the water and died. However we also know two talmiday chachamim were sent along with her, so how would such a case be possible?

Answer

Men and women should wash their hands after haircuts or shaving.

Question Submitted by C K

Question

Does the halacha of Basar She'nis'aleim Min Ha'Ayin apply to turkey and chicken meat? And does taping closed a foil wrapping around a meat sandwich suffice to avoid the issue (e.g., leaving in fridge at work from morning til lunch time)?

Answer

The Ashkenazic custom to have stripes on the talis is to display that we are missing techeilis. It seems that the custom in many places was to have blue stripes and also to have a blue border on the edge of the talis. (Pri Megadim Aishel Avraham 9:7, also see Mishna Berurah 9:16) Over time the custom evolved to display black stripes since black is a sign of mourning.

In his "Ma SheHaya Hu SheYehyeh", Rav Eli Wolf shlita discusses the importance of V'Zos HaBracha on Simchas Torah. There are several factors that were taken into account when making it the Torah reading. One aspect is the finishing of the Torah on the day of Shmini Atzeres (2nd day for us). This is a time of tremendous simcha and happiness when Hashem "asks" us to remain with Him for one more day of holiday before we "leave" to go back to our daily lives. It is at this moment that we express our love and joy by completing the Torah. This parsha also has many verses that express how special the Jewish nation is to Hashem, something apropos for this time. I have wondered if we are also adding to this by having it on a Yom Tov which is based on calendar that is regulated by the Jewish nation. Shabbos happens indepedent of the actions of the Jews, but Yom Tov only is holy because we ordain it holy through our calendar. This also shows the special relationship we have with Hashem. He loves us so much that he empowers us with this mighty task. Either way, it should be noted that most years this parsha is only read on Yom Tov, but every so often it is read on Shabbos but only in Eretz Yisrael.

Lychee and passion fruit are both Ha'Eitz regardless of when they are eaten. At the meal on Rosh Hashana, though, you should have in mind that they be included in the Ha'Eitz made on the apple. A Ha'Motzei only includes food items that are considered to be main portions of the meal such as meats, cheeses, etc. Fruits and candies are not included, so a new bracha must be recited on them. (Shulchan Aruch O.C. 177:1)

This answer, unfortunately, cannot provide the most comprehensive background to your question because of the tremendous complexity involved. There is an apparent contradiction between a Talmudic passage in Miseches Shabbos (34b) and another in Miseches Pesachim (95a) regarding how to calculate the end of the day in halacha. Rabbeinu Tam is famous for his resolution of this matter. The conventional understanding assumes that Rabbeinu Tam's day ends at a 4 "mil" time span from sunset. The most frequent ways to calculate this are either by using 72 minutes after sunset or figuring when the sun is 16.1 degrees below the horizon (which in Baltimore will always be much more than 72 minutes). There are, however, many other opinions as to how to understand this opinion. Coincidentally, Yehoshua, I have written extensively on this topic in my sefer Tiferes Aryeh on Miseches Zevachim (chapter 30) and it would seem to me that it should be when the sun is 4.2 degrees below the horizon (which in Baltimore ranges from approximately 17 - 21 minutes after sunset).

Question Submitted by Yehoshua Sheffield

Question

Yesterday, as I was turning around my car, I scraped some paint off another guy's bumper in a parking lot. There was NO ONE around. I wrote a short letter of apology and $50, all the cash I had on and have access to (I'm in college). There is a strong likelihood that it was a goy's car. Am I obligated to find out who the owner is and give him more $?

Answer

There are a lot of factors to be taken into account with your case. One of these factors is where the incident took place. The interaction between halacha and American law is complex and many more details are necessary to be gathered before commenting on the obligatory action. I can say that it would be appropriate to contact the owner of the other car and inform him that as an observant Jew you wish to repay him.

Question

As it relates to Rosh Hashana, on which of the 2 day(s) are the "simanim" to be eaten/said and on which of 2 day(s) should the "shehechiyanu" be eaten/said?

Answer

Clearly the shidduch process was a bit different back then than it is now! The idea to which you are referring is found in Taanis (26b) and Bava Basra (121a). The girls used to go out dressed in white on Tu B'Av (and Yom Kippur) and ask that the young men choose a wife. It seems that things were, perhaps, a little more arranged and one sided in society in general back then. In general, a woman's parents or brother would find her a suitor and if the suitor found her acceptable then the shidduch would happen. It was necessary for the suitor to see his future wife at least once so that he would know what she looked like. These girls would be going out dressed in white to facilitate this process. Clearly this is not how things work in most circles nowadays and, I believe, most psychologists and therapists will probably tell you that, whether right or wrong, this system would not work within the mindset held by most people today. Rather, many would end up with very poor relationships and would not have Shalom Bayis. Although the system has changed drastically as society has changed, one thing seems to still last. Tu B'Av and Yom Kippur express the qualities that exemplify what a marriage is about and these days are opportune to creating that new relationship. Perhaps the reason stems from the fact that both Tu B'Av and Yom Kippur show a time when two parties, Hashem and Klal Yisrael, can find each other after having been "lost" for some time. All relationships on Earth mimic those that can be achieved between a person/Klal Yisral and Hashem (i.e. a parent to a child, etc.). The closest one is that of man and wife as displayed in Shir HaShirim (see Rashi Shir HaShirim 1:1). On Yom Kippur we find forgiveness and forge a renewed relationship with Hashem and it was on Tu B'Av that Klal Yisrael was given a second chance after the generation of the spies had all died. (see Bava Basra 121b) In both cases the man, the part of the parable of Shir HaShirim that refers to Hashem, chooses His bride, Klal Yisrael, to come back to Him. When a man goes to find his wife, he is looking for something that used to be part of him. In fact, the Gemara tells us that the man needs to look for the woman because he has lost something, therefore, it is he that must find it. (Kiddushin 2b) The Gemara is referring to the fact that Chava was made of Adam's own flesh and therefore the man has lost something that makes him complete. (see Rashi Kiddushin 2b) Just like Hashem RENEWS a relationship with Klal Yisrael on Tu B'Av and Yom Kippur, so too a marriage is not the beginning of something new, but a renewal of an old relationship and it is reflected during this time. I wish you much hatzlacha in your shidduch endeavors, hopefully the right chosson, who is lacking completion, will find you soon to help him out.

Question Submitted by brina cooperman

Question

If you're not supposed to learn on Tisha B'Av, why do the "Yomi" schedules (Daf, Mishna, Halacha, etc.) include the day on the schedule?

Answer

Since I do not work for any of those institutions I cannot answer with certainty. I assume they wish to keep a specific pace and expect the participants to make up that day between the day prior and after Tisha B'Av. Also, we all hope for the days when Mashiach will return and learning will, once again, be permissible on Tisha B'Av. Perhaps, the scheduling is with these aspirations in mind. May we all experience that complete salvation soon.

It is always best to make havdalah on wine when possible. However, in situations where this is not possible one may use what is called "chamar medina" or "the drink of the land". (Shulchan Aruch 296:2) Juice falls within the definitions of what a drink of the land is (although water, milk and oil do not) and is therefore an acceptable substitute when one cannot find wine. (Mishna Berurah 272:25; also see Aruch HaShulchan O.C. 272:14) During the nine days some refrain from using wine for havdalah and use chamar medina instead.

Correct, although I would encourage one to always cover the items with at least one covering in order to make it a habit and to never get into problems.

Question Submitted by Gobbie Cohn

Question

If one is to microwave a closed parve item when its status was that of milchig, what is the state of the parve item, the dish the item was in, and the microwave itself?

Answer

I understood your question as follows: the microwave was milchig and the food item was pareve, the food item was wrapped and then cooked in the microwave. Microwave ovens do not produce heat, rather, the radiation causes the food itself to heat up. That being the case, it is very different from classic ovens and not dealt with directly in the regular chapters of Shulchan Aruch that would normally apply to similar situations in ovens. (Shulchan Aruch Y.D. 105 and 108) Since the oven itself does not become hot the problems that can arise focus more on steam released from the food item, or if the hot food item touched the walls of the microwave. Since the item was "closed" or wrapped there would not be sufficient steam to rise, go into the wall of the microwave and finally return and infuse with the original item. Therefore, the food item would remain pareve. The dish it was in would also remain pareve. Its contact with the milchig microwave could only make it milchig if there was liquid between the dish and the microwave as two vessels will not transfer from one to another via heat unless there is a liquid between them. (Rema Y.D. 92:8, also see Shach Y.D. 105:22) If one is CERTAIN there was liquid in between then he should follow up with a Rav as many more details will be necessary to ascertain whether the dish became milchigs (although the possibility of that is very slim).

Question Submitted by Gobbie Cohn

Question

I received a few emails this morning mentioning that there is a mitzvah to say a bracha when one sees royalty as in the case of Queen Elizabeth visiting New York. While I don't plan to be in NY, if I were and would see her, would I really be m'chuyav to make a bracha? If I saw her on a monitor would I also say the bracha; I'm seeing her after all?

Answer

One should recite a blessing upon seeing a king. For a Jewish king one ends the blessing with "Shenasan MiKivodo LiRaiUv" and for a gentile king he substitutes "LiBasar vaDam" for "LiRaiUv". There is even a specific mitzvah to go out to see a gentile king because if one merits to seeing the future Jewish king, Mashiach, he will see that his glory surpasses that of regular kings (which he has seen). (Berachos 58a and Rashi's commentary) This blessing can only be made on a ruler who has the authority to judge and kill and not someone who is subjected to another's rule. (Mishna Berurah 224:12) Therefore, the blessing cannot be recited on the queen. (See King John's Magna Carta of 1215) In addition, one has to actually see the king (or at least be in his presence and feel the awe as seen by Rav Sheshes in the Gemara) to make the blessing. Just like one cannot make the blessing for lightning after seeing it on screen, one cannot make this blessing if he only saw a king on screen.

Question

Was the Hachnosas Sefer Torah for the Agudah of Greenspring this Sunday? If so what is the heter to have music during the 3 weeks?

Answer

Question Submitted by brina cooperman

Question

Why is carrying one's tallis after shul on Shabbos morning (in a situation where he does not plan to use the tallis for the rest of Shabbos) not considered a purposeless carrying which, therefore, would make it assur?

Answer

Let me first give a little background as it seems a few issues are being meshed into one here. Firstly, there is no prohibition of useless carrying on Shabbos providing there is a valid eruv, such as the Eruv of Baltimore. If there is no eruv then any carrying is prohibited on Shabbos whether with purpose or not. On Yom Tov, however, one is permitted to carry even if there is no vaild eruv, but ONLY if the carrying has some purpose for Yom Tov. If there is no purpose then an eruv is required then, as well. If one is in an area that has no valid eruv and wishes to bring his talis bag home from shul on Yom Tov it is still possible he may do so. Chazal allowed one to carry items if he feels that they are in a place where they can get lost (if moved) or stolen. There is a prohibiton, however, for one to prepare for after Shabbos/Yom Tov while it is still Shabbos/Yom Tov. The issue at hand could be that his bringing his talis bag back is preparation for after Shabbos/Yom Tov. Nevertheless, one does not have to leave his talis bag in shul. His bringing it back is because he is uncomfortable with leaving it there (and keep in mind that by taking it away does help keep the shul clutter free) and is not really for the purpose of using it the next day. A good display of this concept is that many people have a special talis just for Shabbos and you see that they still want to bring it home even though they are not preparing for a weekday by doing so.

If one brought his talis with him to shul on Shabbos morning he is not required to leave it there, rather, he may take it home with him.

Question Submitted by C K

Question

When the 'Malach' allowed Bilam to leave with the messengers, rashi comments from the gemara 'Makkos', Where a person wants to go, (Hashem), will take him there. Why didn't Rashi mention that earlier when Hashem himself allowed him to go?

Answer

Question Submitted by brina cooperman

Question

Must one give ma'aser on money that is given to him/her for a specific purpose (eg. a parent gives a child money to use for gas)?

Yes, there is no violation of Shabbos law if one begins the download prior to the beginning of Shabbos. While one is not allowed to personally violate Shabbos, his property is allowed to violate Shabbos (with the exception of his animals). Therefore, if a prohibited action was started prior to Shabbos one can allow it to finish if no action is required by the person to complete the action. The only exception is an action that will create loud noises. If such an action is required and refraining from doing it will cause undue financial hardship one should speak to his rabbi about that particular case. (See Shulchan Aruch O.C. 252:1-3)

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