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Rabbi Reuven Taragin on Pirkei Avot: What We Gain From Pain

By BJLife/Rabbi Reuven Taragin - Summarized by Rafi Davis

Posted on 01/22/23

Parshas HaShavua Divrei Torah sponsored by
Dr. Shapsy Tajerstein, DPM - Podiatry Care.
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בֶּן הֵא הֵא אוֹמֵר, לְפוּם צַעֲרָא אגרא: (אבות ה:כג)


Last week, we saw how Ben Hei Hei links the agra (reward) received for mitzvah fulfillment to the tza’ar — the effort and paininvolved.”[1] The obvious question is why this linkage exists. Why is the reward proportional to the tza’ar?


The answer to this question hinges on how we understand the agra referred to by the mishnah. What type of sechar does it refer to?


Reward


The standard explanation[2] is that the mishnah refers to the sechar given to us by Hashem. Hashem rewards us most for the mitzvah fulfillment we find challenging and painful. The Sefer Chassidim[3] explains that Hashem is fully aware and appreciative of our efforts, not just what we accomplish.


Benefit


Avot D’Rebbi Natan[4] seems to have a different understanding of agra, because it links the agra to the fact that the tza’ar is inherently good for man.According to ADR”N, the agra is the intrinsic benefit we receive naturally from the tza’ar, not some external heavenly reward.


What natural benefit do we derive from effort and pain?




Comprehension — The “Butter” of Torah


The Meiri[5] connects Ben Hei Hei’s statement to Torah learning and defines the reward as our comprehension of Torah. We grasp ideas best when we work hard to understand them.[6] The more effort we invest in our learning, the better we understand the material.


The Meiri’s explanation echoes the Gemara’s[7] assertion that “yagati u’matzati, ta’amin — (only) one who claims that ‘I worked and found’ should be believed. It is hard work that facilitates “finding” the ultimate comprehension.


For this reason, Rav Kook[8] rejected attempts to make Torah learning more user-friendly. He argued that hard work is critical to achieving a high level of Torah study. This is how he explained the Gemara’s assertion that “the butter of Torah” can only be achieved by those who “spit out their mothers’ milk.”[9] Those who settle for “mothers’ milk,” learning that is spoon-fed to them, will never invest the effort needed to create “butter”the deeper, more advanced form of Torah. Though we should help people succeed in their learning, we should avoid spoon-feeding because the extra effort yields a higher level of comprehension.[10]




Retention The Torah of “Af


The Rambam[11] links Ben Hei Hei’s statement to our retention of Torah learning. We remember ideas that we work hard to understand.[12] Reish Lakish[13] made this point in a strong way by asserting that Torah learning only “remains” with those who “kill themselves” to attain it.


Easy come, easy go. Only the Torah that we make sacrifices to learn remains with us years later. Shlomo HaMelech called this the Torah we study “b’af  — under duress.”[14] Even Shlomo HaMelech, the wisest amongst men, recognized that the wisdom he retained best was that which he struggled to attain.[15]




Appreciation


Part of why we retain what we work hard to attain is because we appreciate it more. We care about what we struggle and sacrifice for. This is why Hashem arranged for His three greatest gifts to us — Torah, Eretz Yisrael, and Olam Haba — to all be nikneit b’yisurin, acquired through suffering.[16] We appreciate the missions that are difficult to complete; the tza’ar we experience helps us appreciate the goals we accomplish.


The Beit Yosef and the Ramchal (based on the Zohar) saw this appreciation as the reason why Hashem created our world. This world’s reality of Hashem’s hidden presence affords us the opportunity to choose to commit ourselves to Him. This makes our reward in the World to Come  — a close relationship with Hashem — more meaningful to us. We appreciate a relationship we have to work hard to develop more than one that is easily achieved.[17]


Rabbi Jonathan Sacks[18] used this idea to explain why the degree of observance of the Yamim Tovim is proportional to how difficult each one is to observe; the ones hardest to observe are the ones most observed.[19] Pesach requires more advanced preparatory work than any other Yom Tov. Yom Kippur is the day hardest to complete. Surprisingly, the percentage of Jews who observe these two holidays is significantly higher than that of those easier to observe. We appreciate and are therefore most committed to that which is most difficult.




Growth — Making Ourselves Stronger


The struggle and pain we endure also strengthens our character. Difficult circumstances force us to develop additional skills and aspects of our personality.


Rav Elimelech Biderman[20] describes a street in Lakewood which was hit by Hurricane Sandy. The trees on one side of the street were all uprooted while the parallel ones on the other side remained standing. The only difference between the rows of trees was that the trees on the first side of the street benefited from a custom-made watering system, while the trees on the second side did not. The conveniently available water allowed the first set of trees to survive without needing to forge deep roots. They were thus easily uprooted. In contrast, the trees without easy access to water were forced to strike deep roots. These roots helped them survive the hurricane. Difficult circumstances force us to develop stronger survival skills.


Rabbi Lamm[21] applied this idea to chinuch habonim (child rearing) and cautioned against over-protecting:


“Without labor and struggle, without exertion of the intellect and long hours of patient plodding, one can neither master the intricacies of any profession, nor can one achieve great and satisfying success in any business.


It is true about children— if we over-protect them, if we train them to accept easy triumphs, the shortcuts to success, then they will grow up without backbones, nurtured on the infantile conception that a wishbone is enough.


Such people can never fly, they can only flutter.


Their vision never soars, their dreams remain myopic, their conceptions petty.”




No Pain…


Our mishnah reminds us of the famous saying: “No pain, no gain.” Our “gain,” or, as the mishnah describes it — our agra, is proportional not only to our accomplishments, but also to the effort we invest and the pain we endure.


This agra consists of both heavenly blessings as well as our own internal personal growth. The challenges we face help us reach and retain higher levels of learning and spirituality and also inspire us to develop ourselves as stronger people. 







[1] Masechet Avot 5:23.




[2] Rashi to Avot 5:23, Rambam Hilchot Talmud Torah 3:6, and Rambam Shemonah Perakim 6 all use the word sechar.




[3] Sefer Chassidim 155.




[4] Avot D’Rabbi Natan 3:6. The full formulation is that “One accomplishment achieved through is better for man that one hundred that he achieves with ease.” 


The Chofetz Chayim (Be’er HaParshah Toldot 5783) once used this source to raise the spirits of a talmid who after one months of learning had only reached daf gimmel. The Chofetz Chaim responded that, based on this source in AD”N, the talmid should vies himself as actually on daf kuf gimmel.




[5] Meiri to Avot 5:23.




[6] The better understanding can be understood as an external reward for, or a natural result of, our efforts.




[7] Talmud Bavli, Masechet Megillah 6b.




[8] Ein Ayah, Berachot 9: pg. 344.




[9] Talmud Bavli, Mesechet Berachot 63b.




[10] See Chovat HaTalmidim (pg. 22-23) who applies this idea to spiritual development. The spiritual level we reach is directly proportional to the amount of effort we invest.




[11] Rambam to Avot 5:23.




[12] The source for the Rambam is Kohelet Rabbah (2:9).




[13] Talmud Bavli, Masechet Berachot 63b. Understandably, this piece is followed by the gemara about the butter of Torah that Rav Kook built off of (see footnote 8). See also Talmud Bavli, Masechet Ketubot 23b.




[14] See Sefer Kohelet 2:9 with Midrash Zuta. See also Yalkut Shimoni Kohelet 3:968.




[15] See Rambam, Mishneh Torah, Hilchot Talmud Torah 3:12 who connects this midrash and the aforementioned words of Reish Lakish.




[16] Masechet Berachot 5a.




[17] The meforshim call the latter type “bread of shame”.


The Radak (Hoshe’a 8:13) applies this idea to Hashem as well. He explains that Hashem compares himself to a mother bear because she has to work hard to give birth. This heightens her appreciation of the children she gives birth to.




[18] Reflections on Pesach: What Does Avodah Mean To You?, Rabbi Jonathan Sacks.




[19] Similarly, the Gemara (Bava Metzia 38) writes that a person prefers his own kav to nine kavs gifted from someone else.




[20] Be’er HaParsha, Naso 5782.




[21] Backbone — A Sermon on the Anatomy of the Spirit, Rabbi Norman Lamm.